Broken Fairytale
by xana4
Summary: "She's broken. Well, she's Serena van der Woodsen. Broken is her middle name."  Chuck/Serena
1. Chapter 1

_**AN: This is my first Gossip Girl fiction ever. I have no idea if I did this right or not because it's been a while since I've last seen anything gossip girl related. But I was bored and needed to have some fun with new characters. I'm a huge Serena/Chuck fan so I decided to give it a try. I'm not really sure of how many chapters this will have but you can expect at least 3, if I get some good feedback. Enjoy ;-)**_

She's broken.

Well, she's Serena van der Woodsen.

Broken is her middle name.

She can't really remember a time in which she felt anything but that for more than just a few hours. Or at least she doesn't want to think about it because it would only lead to unnecessary pain.

She wasn't entirely happy when she was dating Dan.

It's not that he wasn't a good guy. He was and he treated her right. He was sweet, caring and as sensitive as one can be. The problem was that Serena is not the kind of girl who simply dates nice guys.

She's a troublemaker and a nice guy can't handle the ridiculous number of extraordinary stories that come with dating her. Partying hard comes with the package and Dan is more the stay-home kind of guy.

Therefore, after a while, Serena realized that Dan wasn't enough.

He couldn't handle her.

She tried dating Nate for a while.

He seemed to be the perfect combination. He knew her so well that nothing would be able to really surprise him. He had the 'nice guy' exterior but she knew he had a wild person inside of him. She tried to bring that Nate out.

But, in the end, they both realized she wasn't what he needed and he was far from being what she needed. Sure, he was one step closer to that than Dan but it was still some steps away. Someone like Blair was the one for him, no matter how much they both tried to deny it.

She had many boyfriends besides Nate and Dan but those were so far away from what she craved that Serena doesn't give them a lot of thought.

She's sitting on Chuck's couch, all those thoughts running through her mind.

It's a lazy Saturday afternoon in the middle of the winter. It's too cold outside for her to venture out and she doesn't feel like discussing boys or clothes with Blair.

She doesn't want Nate questioning her about what's wrong.

She is feeling lazy and this couch never seemed quite so comfortable. The cup of hot chocolate in her hands is all she needs at the moment, combined with the warmth provided by the blanket draped across her legs.

She's so wrapped up in her thoughts that she doesn't hear someone opening the door and only realizes she's not alone anymore when Chuck sits next to her on the couch with a glass of scotch in his hands.

"I'm not even going to ask how you managed to simply walk into my house and make yourself at home."

Serena gives him an adorable smile and rests her head on his shoulder. "You said I could always come by and visit you whenever I felt broken."

Yes, Chuck knows just how broken she is.

He has been there to witness most of her downfalls, most of her breakdowns and to help her with all her problems. He understands it all because he is just the same.

So, Chuck simply takes a sip out of his drink and rests one of his hands on her blanket-covered legs. "What happened this time?"

It's a simple question.

She knows she can tell him anything. He never judges, never says a bad word about her behavior and never lectures her about the rashness of some of her decisions.

That's why she answers him without thinking twice about it.

"Blair is getting married."

Chuck lets out a dry laugh and pats her leg. "Don't tell me you're getting jealous now…I never pegged you for someone who would want to marry a prince."

Serena laughs and wraps her arms around his body, just to be close to him.

It's comfortable…easy.

"I never wanted to marry a prince. But I've always wanted my happily-ever-after. She's getting hers in just a few days."

Chuck drops a kiss on the top of her head, a very rare gesture of affection that he never dares to perform if they're not alone. "There's no such thing as happily-ever-after, Serena."

That makes her frown.

Serena lifts her head from his shoulder and unwraps her arms from around him to look into his eyes. "Do you really believe in that?"

Chuck shrugs and takes another sip out of his drink, not seeming to care about her reaction. "Why wouldn't I?"

Serena has never been one to believe in fairytales either but, for some reason, this is a discussion she wants to have with Chuck. For some reason, it bothers her that he really thinks like that.

"Do you really think that two people who love each other can't be happy together for the rest of their life?"

He shrugs once again and it starts to get on her nerves.

"Look around, Serena. My father was a liar and never told me who my mother was. Blair's father divorced her mother to run away with another man. Nate's father is in jail and his mother is a wreck. Your mother collects husbands like medals. I've never had a relationship that lasted more than three months. Nate never dated anyone other than Blair for more than four months. Blair is searching for that fairytale life and ends up smashing other people on her way up. And don't even get me started on your past relationships. How can you believe in a happily-ever-after when you're surrounded by this kind of things? Just stop living on that dream-world and look around for once in your life, Serena."

His words would probably hurt any other person.

But she's different.

She doesn't let that stop her because she knows that, in the end, he wants to believe that as much as she does but is afraid of hoping. No one can ever say that Serena is not stubborn, though.

She insists, when any other person would have given up.

"It doesn't have to be in a romantic way. What about a friendship that lasts forever?"

He laughs and finishes his drink. "Are you talking about whom, exactly? No friendship here can last more than just a few months without a huge fight breaking. You and Blair are no exception. You fight every two months, spend two weeks without even talking to each other and then everything goes back to normal. The same thing happens with you and Nate. That's not happily-ever-after. It's happily-until-our-next-fight."

Serena gives up. This conversation is starting to depress her and the last thing she needs right now is that.

She's starting to realize that maybe she's what's wrong in all those friendships. Maybe she was what was wrong in all her past relationships.

If he doesn't want to understand what she wants to say, then it's fine by her. She's not sure if she believes that anymore, either.

She gets up from the couch without saying a word, puts her shoes on and grabs her purse. Chuck doesn't make a move to stop her but she wasn't really expecting him to.

So, she leaves without saying a word.

Sure, she needed to feel a bit less lonely today but if Chuck wants to be a cold-hearted guy then let him be.

She can wallow in her own misery alone. Or in the company of a bartender willing to pour her a few drinks…

**X**

**X**

**Should I go on or just leave it like this?**

**Love, **

**Sarah**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

She doesn't see him during the next couple of days.

Well, that might be because she avoids going to any place where she thinks she might run into him.

It's childish and immature but in her mind it makes sense.

She always knew Chuck wasn't exactly the kind of guy who believes in happy endings but that doesn't mean he had to crush all her hopes and dreams with no more than five sentences.

And the sad part was that, after giving it some thought, she reaches the painful conclusion that he was right.

There's no such thing as happily-ever-after and all those who believe in that are nothing but fools. How could she never see that before?

One way or another, Serena doesn't say a word about it to anyone.

Blair is getting married to a freaking prince and she's pretty sure the last thing her friend needs to hear is that she's not going to be happy forever.

Right now, she's flouting on a cloud.

Everything is nice.

Serena doesn't want to be the one to tell her that cloud will not carry her forever. Sooner or later, she's going to end up falling and it will be a hell of a fall.

She simply helps Blair getting everything ready for the royal wedding and plays her part as the perfect best friend, even though Chuck's words keep running through her mind over and over again.

It's like a bad song, really. You hear it once and you hate it but, no matter how hard you try, you can't see to get rid of the contagious tune on your head. But she pushes her own feelings as far away as she possibly can.

Blair doesn't seem to notice a single change in her. It's Serena. She has good days and bad days and Blair learned a long time ago that one shouldn't question Serena about it if not ready for an answer that can be as sad as illegal.

Nate notices something is off and actually asks her what's going on but, after receiving nothing but a shrug and a small smile, he knows better than to push the matter further. A while ago, he thought he could speak fluent Serena but time showed him otherwise. One can never predict what she will do next.

It would be a lot like predicting the unpredictable. That would make the unpredictable, predictable and Serena is anything but that.

Chuck avoids anything wedding-related like the plague so they don't see him during the whole week before the wedding. That's good because the last person she feels like facing at the moment is the person who made her start thinking like this, like someone who can't bring herself to believe in happy endings.

She only sees him at the wedding.

He comes in to congratulate Blair before the wedding and tell her that he wishes her all the best.

Serena tries to avoid being in the same room as him but Chuck doesn't seem to care about that. He simply sits there with Serena, Blair and Nate, reminiscing about the good old days in which they would spend nights partying and mornings in bed with hangovers.

They all laugh and have a good time and, when it's time for Blair to walk down the aisle they all hug her and take their places on the big church.

Nate sits on one of the benches and Serena sits next to him, Chuck sitting on the other side of her.

It's only halfway through the ceremony that it hits her.

She's losing her best friend.

She's losing Blair.

And that's enough for her to start tearing up.

Nate sees a tear making its way down her face and rubs her back in comfort, even though he's not sure of why she's crying. Chuck seems not to notice anything but, when she least expects her, he hands her his handkerchief. She takes it without saying a word and he doesn't even look at her.

By the end of the ceremony, everyone starts heading towards the place where the reception will take place. She rides with Nate and Chuck and it's not nearly as awkward as she thought it would be, given the fact that she has been trying her best to stay the hell away from Chuck.

They get to the reception and Chuck motions Nate to start walking while he grabs her hand and starts walking in the other direction. Serena has no other choice but to follow him, even if she's slightly afraid of what he's going to say.

Chuck finally stops near a bench, beneath a tall tree, and turns to her. "This is not us."

She knows what he means with that. Serena thought he wasn't aware of her avoidance during the past few days but she should have known better. Chuck has the ability to read her like an open book and figure out all her reactions.

So she shrugs. "What do you want me to do?"

Chuck shakes his head, not making a move to let go of her hand. "I don't know, Serena. You're the one who's been avoiding me. What, you though I wouldn't notice?"

She doesn't feel like having this talk, not today. So she tries to avoid it. "I've been busy helping Blair with last minute arrangements to the wedding."

Chuck finally lets go of her hand and sits on the bench. "If you want to pretend this is normal, at least come up with a better excuse. Come on, Serena. You're the girl who woke me up more than once way after midnight just because you felt like having a drink and you wanted some company. I can't count how many times we fell asleep on my couch after one of those times don't say you were too busy because the Serena I know is never too busy to visit me. So cut the bullshit and tell me what I have to do to fix this. Even better, tell me what the hell I did to make you react like this."

And that's when it hits her. He has no idea of why she's been avoiding him. But he deserves the truth and she can't deny him that.

Serena sits next to him on the bench and takes one of hands in hers. "I'm sorry, Chuck. It's nothing you did wrong, I promise. It's just that…My head has been a mess lately."

He removes his hand from hers and gets up. He stands there, his back to her, for a few seconds. Then, he turns around and he has his mask on, the one that shows no emotions whatsoever. "You used to come to me when your head was a mess."

She nods and tries to reach for his hand, needing to feel him for some reason she'd rather not think about. But he doesn't allow her to do so and she sighs. "You were right!"

Her voice was just a whisper but he seems to have heard it. However, he's frowning when she looks up. "I'm usually right but what are you talking about?"

Serena sighs again and gets up, standing face to face with him. "The other day, when you said that there's no such thing as happily-ever-after…you were right. I was a fool to believe that two people can have a happy ending. I guess that if they're happy, then it's not the end. You were right. Not even friendships last forever."

Chuck stands there, looking at her and not saying a word. When she can't stand it anymore, Serena sighs again and whispers. "Blair must be getting here. I better go inside."

And when she walks away, he doesn't stop her.

A part of her wishes he had. Later, that night, she falls asleep on her couch holding the handkerchief he handed her at the wedding and wishing things would go back to normal.

Chuck is…she doesn't even know how to finish that sentence but she's sure he's one of the most important people in her life and it pains her to be away from him.

**X**

**Next chapter will be up as soon as possible and it will feature Chuck's POV.**

**Reviews are love,**

**Sarah**


	3. Chapter 3

_**AN: This story was supposed to be a few more chapters long but, due to the lack of reviews and response to this story, I decided it will only have one more chapter. An author is nothing without his/her readers and if my readers aren't happy with this, I'll just write a chapter to end it and move on. Enjoy ;-)**_

It takes her a week to get over her issues and summon the courage to go talk to Chuck.

She's being childish and this thing they have going on is completely pointless.

So what if he has a different opinion from hers? Why does that matter? They've fought about more important things before without this kind of drama.

So Serena swallows her pride and goes to his house. But Chuck is not there and Nate can't tell her where he is. She's not sure if he really doesn't know or if he just doesn't want to tell her but either way is fine by her. If Chuck is too busy to make the time to solve their issues, then she's way past caring.

She won't search him again.

And she almost sticks to her word.

But then another week goes by and she starts getting worried. She calls Nate and hears the 'Chuck is not home right now' excuse. Something is definitely wrong if Chuck is avoiding her. Maybe this is it. Maybe they will never go back to what they used to be.

But she can't bring herself to believe such a thing so she decides it's time to play dirty.

Grabbing her mother's phone, she sends a quick text to Chuck to meet her there because they have some things to discuss. Serena knows how childish this is but she has run out of ideas and out of places to look for him. This is her last resource. She waits by her mother's phone, biting her nail in the process. The two minutes it takes him to answer seem to last forever but she lets out a sigh of relief when his 'I'm on my way' reaches the phone.

Her mother leaves for a meeting only a few minutes later and she's home alone, waiting for Chuck.

She needs to solve this once and for all.

Serena hears his footsteps even before she can see him and hears his voice, loud and clear, even though she's inside her bedroom and he's in the living room.

"That was a low-blow, Serena."

She gets out of her bedroom and shrugs. "You came."

Chuck unbuttons his jacket and sits on the couch. "As much as it pains me to admit it, I can never say no to you."

And that does it for her. She doesn't know why, but she can't stop the tears that star running down her cheeks. It's all too much. She misses him, misses who he used to be for her.

He was her 'fixer'. He could always fix anything for her. If someone did anything to hurt her, he would make them pay for it. If someone dared to say a bad word about her, there would be hell to pay. No one could disrespect Serena in front of him. And now, they can't even make it through one simple conversation. And all because he said nothing lasts forever.

It seems stupid, she's aware of it. But that's the truth.

She feels his arm around her shoulders while she sobs but doesn't dare to look at him, afraid that will only make things worse. He pulls her to him and hugs her, trying to comfort her even though he has no idea why she's crying.

He tries to soothe her but she doesn't seem to get any calmer. Chuck sighs and makes her look at him, despite the tears that are still making their way down her delicate cheeks.

"I didn't mean it, Serena."

She knows what he's referring to and, just like that, her tears stop. She gives him a light smile and reaches for a handkerchief that she had in her pocket to wipe away her tears.

"I know you meant it, there's no use denying it. But I still appreciate the effort."

Chuck shakes his head and ignores the fact that she's currently wiping away her tears with his handkerchief. It's only fair seeing as he's the one to blame for the redness in her eyes.

"I didn't mean it, Serena. My head was a mess and you ended up seeing the end of it. I do believe in happily-ever-after's or at least I want to."

Serena grabs his hand and squeezes it. "You don't have to say that just to make me feel better. I'm okay, Chuck. I'm a big girl."

She gets up and he follows her, standing in front of her when she tries to enter her bedroom. "If you're a big girl face the reality of this situation."

Serena frowns. "I am facing the reality!"

Chuck lets out a dry laugh. "Are you sure about that? Because, from where I'm standing, it seems like you gave up believing in something just because I was being an idiot that day. It seems like our relationship has been on the rocks lately because you took my words to heart. It seems that you made me come here and now you're running away, just like you always do when things get too complicated for you to deal with. That's why your relationships don't last forever, Serena."

And, even though it kind of feels like giving up and the last thing he wants to do is actually giving up, Chuck gives her a choice. He gets out of her way and starts walking to the leaving room, throwing one last sentence at her without even looking at her frozen form.

"If you want to talk, I'll be waiting for you in the living room. If you want to do what you're best at, go ahead and hide in your room."

Serena gets angry, all of a sudden. She's not sure why she's angry but she is. He's being an idiot and he shouldn't talk about what he doesn't know.

She's not running away because things are too complicated to deal with. She's running away because she can't stand this close to him without feeling guilty, or ashamed even.

He's Chuck Bass.

He's the guy girls know better than to fall for. He's the one who doesn't do commitment or even feelings. He's all about sex.

She knows that. She has known him for long enough to know every little dirty detail about him and his conquests. That should draw her away.

But it doesn't.

In the end, he's still Chuck Bass. And, for her, he's more than just that. He's the one who has never judged her, never said a bad word about her behind her back. He's the one who always has her back, who always stands up for her.

So, despite her better judgment, she fell for him.

They say the worst part is not falling for someone. The worst and scariest part is acknowledging it and doing something about it.

But she can't do anything about it. How is she supposed to tell him she is in love with him and that it's not going away anytime soon?

Her anger takes control, though, and before she can fully think about her actions, she's standing right in front of Chuck and the words are coming out of her mouth without her permission.

"I'm not hiding because I'm a coward or because that's my natural mechanism, what I'm good at. I'm hiding because looking at you is like a stab in my heart. I'm hiding because I'm so in love with you that it's ridiculous. I know I shouldn't love you because we're friends and, let's face it, you only care about sex. But I am and I can't stand to be this close to you and just ignore my feelings. That's why it broke my heart when you said those things to me. And the worst part is that, even after that, I just kept loving you with all the little broken pieces."

She stands there, in front of a stunned Chuck Bass, breathing fast and with tears running down her cheeks once again.

He doesn't say a word so she sighs and whispers. "You're free to leave whenever you feel like it."

And with that much said, Serena turns her back to him and locks herself in her bedroom.

**X**

**X**

**Here's your chapter. I'll post the next one as soon as I can.**

**And, before you comment on the date, I want to make one thing very clear here. I hate Valentine's Day.**

**I'm not saying this because I don't have anyone to celebrate it with. I have a boyfriend (an amazing one, really). I just don't like this day.**

**I'm posting the chapter today because I've been busy with school work and I will be busy during the next two/three days.**

**Reviews are highly appreciated, as usual. **

**Despite my hate for this particular day, I hope you're all having a nice one.**

**Sarah**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4 **

Another week of awkwardness goes by without any visible changes.

Serena avoids going to places where she knows she might run into Chuck and successfully avoids him during said week. She doesn't know whether to feel ashamed or relieved. At least now he knows how she feels and can give her some space to get over the feelings she shouldn't even have, to begin with.

Serena is home alone, sitting comfortably on the couch with a book in her hands when Nate shows up and sits next to her. She gives him a small smile and puts her book down.

"What brings you here, Nate?"

He shrugs and grabs her hand. "I was bored and decided to come and see if you wanted to have lunch with me."

Serena fears that leaving the house will make her run into Chuck but she also knows that refusing to have lunch with Nate will lead to a lot of questions she doesn't want to answer. So she kisses his cheek with a smile on her face and goes to her bedroom to get ready to leave with him.

She puts on a pair of black high heels and combs her hair. That's all she really needs and, in less than ten minutes, she's ready to go. Nate guides her outside and hails them a cab. Not noticing how nervous she is with the simple thought of leaving the house.

Serena doesn't really pay attention to where they are going. She trusts Nate enough to relax for a bit. When the cab stops she smiles. He brought her to her favorite restaurant.

They get out of the cab and a smiling doorman opens the door for her. She stops before entering, though, realizing that Nate is not following her. She turns around and sees him on the phone. He sends her an apologetic look.

"Go ahead and get us a table. I just have to call my mom."

Serena nods and enters the restaurant.

Shock overtakes her as soon as she looks around the room. Nate played her.

The restaurant is completely empty, there's no one around. But it's not hard for her to figure out there is definitely someone there.

The entire room is beautifully decorated with her favorite flowers, purple roses. There's a table for two set up in the middle of the room with a green towel and candles.

Her friends know that her favorite flowers are purple roses, that her favorite color is green and that she believes candles are perfect to set up a romantic mood. But, as soon as she hears the music playing on the background she knows who did this.

There is only one person who knows about her huge thing for Queen. As _Love Of My Life _plays on the background, she takes one tentative step forward and hears soft footsteps from behind her.

She recognizes the cologne he wears and doesn't have to turn around to know who's there with her.

"You used Nate to bring me here."

His hand touches her arm but she doesn't turn around quite yet. His voice is enough to send chills down her spine but she doesn't care. This is too good to be just a dream, right?

"Would you have accepted to come if I told you the truth?"

She shakes her head because she's sure her voice would come out slightly shaky if she tried to talk.

"What's this, Chuck?"

He turns her around so he can look into her eyes and gives her a small smile. "This is me showing you that some things do last forever, or at least me trying to do so."

Serena shakes her head and looks away from him, not fully believing this is happening. "Our friendship is not one of those things that last forever, at least not after what I told you a week ago. You didn't need to do this. I'm aware that things between us will never be the same again."

Chuck shakes his head and grabs her chin gently to try to make her meets his eyes. But when he does, the sight before him breaks his heart. There are unshed tears on her eyes, tears she's trying hard to keep at bay. He's the reason behind those tears and if he could go back in time he would slap his past-self as hard as possible for doing this to the most amazing girl he has ever met.

"Serena, you're right about one thing. Things between us will never be the same again."

And that does it for her. Before he can say anything else the tears are running down her cheeks at an alarming pace and he doesn't know what do to do to stop them. He tries to gather her in his arms and hold her until she's feeling better but she pulls away from him as soon as he makes a move to do so.

She wipes away the tears from her cheeks but to no avail because fresh ones take their place almost instantly. She feels silly but she can't stop herself.

Serena shakes her head and takes a step back, putting some distance between them. "I want to go home."

Chuck loses it. In fact, he's surprised he managed to keep his frustration at bay for this long. And the words are coming out of his mouth before he even thinks about them.

"You're an idiot, Serena."

She slaps him. She doesn't know why but she slaps him. Maybe it's because she opened up her heart to him, told him what she felt and now she's calling her stupid. And she is stupid. She's well aware of that because only a very stupid person would fall for Chuck Bass after knowing him as well as she does.

Then she turns around and starts walking out of the restaurant but arm wrapped around her waist stops her and turns her back around. There's something on his eyes she has never seen before, something she's afraid to name. She only knows that it scares her and thrills her at the same time.

"You can slap me all you want but you're not leaving this restaurant until I tell you every single thing I have to tell you. And I don't care if I have to tie you to a damn chair to make you listen. I have duct tape and I'm not afraid to use it, Serena."

She gives up, knowing that she can't win this one and that he would probably tie her to the chair if it came to it. Chuck feels her relax in his arms and sighs.

"Look around, Serena. Does this look like someone who doesn't care? Does it look like I'm trying to run away from you? You're an idiot because you fell for me. That's the truth and I'm pretty sure you know that. But I'm glad you did."

Serena feels her breath catch on her throat upon hearing his words and allows him to rest a hand on her cheek before continuing. "I don't think I can live without you, Serena. I don't want to live without you. This past few weeks have been hell for me. It killed me to know you were so mad at me that you didn't even want to see me. Falling for me was a big mistake but I promise you I will spend the rest of my life proving you that I'm worth of your love, doing every single thing I can not to hurt you. I love you, Serena."

Serena is not capable of saying a word, too shocked to do more than stand there and look at him. He removes his hand from her face and sighs. "I won't stop you from leaving, now, if that's what you want."

And that's enough to break her trance. Before he can even blink, she's in his arms, her arms wrapped around his neck and her legs around his waist. He holds onto her, wrapping his arms around her waist to keep her steady. He can feel her smile against his neck and lets out a laugh because this is right.

This is perfect.

Then she lifts her head and kisses him.

And he just knows they're going to last forever.

He'll make sure she has her fairytale…her happily-ever-after.


End file.
